Buyer Driver 01: Recognition

Meeting buyers where they are—before telling them where to go.

Not every buyer wants praise.
Most don’t want to be the hero.
But every buyer wants to feel understood.

And in high-stakes buying conversations, that starts with recognition.

So what is Recognition—really?

It’s not flattery.
It’s not “great job!” or “you’re crushing it.”
It’s something quieter. Sharper. More earned.

Recognition is about showing that you see where your buyer is,
what they’re navigating, and
what they’re trying to accomplish—before you offer a path forward.

It’s the opposite of defaulting to your deck.
It’s saying: “I’ve paid attention to what matters to you, and that’s the context I’m operating from.”

And when it’s missing? Buyers feel like they’re just being pitched—again.

Where this shows up in the real world:

The head of Ops juggling a hiring freeze but still trying to improve workflows
A first-time VP under pressure to choose a scalable tool—without making a visible mistake
A senior IC who knows the pain firsthand, but needs buy-in from people three levels removed

In all these cases, the buyer is weighing more than features or price.
They’re trying to make the right move, at the right time, in a way that fits their world.

Your job isn’t to praise them.
It’s to notice.

What Recognition sounds like in a deal:

“It seems like you're making space for this project in a pretty overloaded roadmap. That tells me it matters.”

“You're trying to fix something that isn’t technically broken—but still isn’t working the way you need. That’s not easy to take on.”

“You’re holding the tension between short-term urgency and long-term strategy. Let’s stay in that balance as we build this.”

Notice what those have in common?

No flattery
No ego stroking
Just honest, situational awareness

You’re not building them up. You’re meeting them in the pressure they already feel.

That’s what makes Recognition land.

Why this matters

Buyers don’t want to feel “sold to.”
But more than that, they don’t want to feel unseen.

When you skip Recognition, it feels like you’ve come in with a plan that has nothing to do with them.

Recognition builds the foundation for everything else:

It opens the door to real conversation
It earns permission to dig deeper
And it sets the tone for a sale that’s aligned, not imposed

When a buyer feels recognized, they lean in—not because they’re flattered, but because they feel like, “This person gets what I’m up against.”

How to put this into action

1. Pause before your next meeting or follow-up.

Ask yourself:

What do I know about where this person sits in their org, what pressure they might be under, or what decision they’re trying to make?

2. Open with that awareness.

Not a pitch. Not a check-in.
Just a brief, grounded signal that shows: “I haven’t forgotten what you’re carrying.”

3. Let that recognition shape the rest of your conversation.

When buyers feel seen, they stop defending.
When they stop defending, they start collaborating.

That’s when momentum actually starts.

Closing thought

Recognition isn’t about ego or emotion.
It’s about alignment.

It tells the buyer: “I’m not here to impress you. I’m here to help—on your terms.”

Do that well, and you won’t need a silver bullet pitch.
You’ll have something better:
a buyer who’s willing to work with you, not just listen to you.